tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18375173.post115551449827618448..comments2024-03-28T03:15:55.088-04:00Comments on Fetch me my axe: A bit more on this "abuse" businessUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18375173.post-1155661044476567002006-08-15T12:57:00.000-04:002006-08-15T12:57:00.000-04:00I'm sure this is as much my own thing as anything ...<I>I'm sure this is as much my own thing as anything else, but the "selfish" business in particular (which I wrote about a coupla weeks ago, I remember), that rings bells...and has always struck me as a tack-women,- or at least the marginalized (I guess that could be pretty much anyone, true) tend to use.</I><BR/><BR/>Purely anecdotal, but "selfish" was what I always heard from my mom while I wasAmber Rheahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02109708537597646450noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18375173.post-1155584508146421682006-08-14T15:41:00.000-04:002006-08-14T15:41:00.000-04:00I'm sure this is as much my own thing as anything ...I'm sure this is as much my own thing as anything else, but the "selfish" business in particular (which I wrote about a coupla weeks ago, I remember), that rings bells...and has always struck me as a tack-women,- or at least the marginalized (I guess that could be pretty much anyone, true) tend to use. <BR/><BR/>I mean specifically, used as a weapon when you won't concede...well, often enough it belledame222https://www.blogger.com/profile/13947289856453172848noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18375173.post-1155583959937419232006-08-14T15:32:00.000-04:002006-08-14T15:32:00.000-04:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.belledame222https://www.blogger.com/profile/13947289856453172848noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18375173.post-1155583579094739022006-08-14T15:26:00.000-04:002006-08-14T15:26:00.000-04:00>setting boundariesBingo.And this is where sociopo...>setting boundaries<BR/><BR/>Bingo.<BR/><BR/>And this is where sociopolitical cant falls down and something else has to step up. It's not enough having this Patriarchy (or name yer monolith)-blaming structure if abuse still manages to slither outside of its determined parameters.belledame222https://www.blogger.com/profile/13947289856453172848noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18375173.post-1155581213959028842006-08-14T14:46:00.000-04:002006-08-14T14:46:00.000-04:00"I was only kidding. Don't be so sensitive." Or,..."I was only kidding. Don't be so sensitive." Or, my favourite is when someone actively and obviously flirts in front of his/her partner, then says, "Don't be so insecure." It says, if you think poorly of me, it's because of your own lack of self-esteem; and, if I do end up screwing around on you, it's because your poor self-esteem drove me to it. Priceless.<BR/><BR/>"I know what you really Sagehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14481252201307998355noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18375173.post-1155579374510193202006-08-14T14:16:00.000-04:002006-08-14T14:16:00.000-04:00The second list is my childhood, in a nutshell. I...The second list is my childhood, in a nutshell. It's also my adult relationship to my parents, until in the last year or so i began to stand my ground.<BR/><BR/>It's no wonder I ended up married to a guy who was equally manipulative.Troublehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16553273498093394669noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18375173.post-1155570227211216872006-08-14T11:43:00.000-04:002006-08-14T11:43:00.000-04:00Wow. Thanks for posting this.In the years I've spe...Wow. Thanks for posting this.<BR/><BR/>In the years I've spent in therapy, it took me a looooong time to recognize a lot of the stuff on that list as abuse. And in a lot of ways I am still working on some of it. I think it's important for people to be reminded that a lot of the stuff we (especially women) just accept <I>is</I> abuse. For example, I can't tell you how many times growing up I heardAmber Rheahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02109708537597646450noreply@blogger.com