Asshole Bingo!

-Is- there a card? for the generalized phenomenon, I mean? if not, there ought to be.

or maybe it's more of a flowchart. anyway at the moment, sans graphic or structure, the components go something like this:


*God, I can't understand how anyone could do/behave like/call themselves/be THAT. Sick, stupid, messed-up, filthy, sad... I wring my hands in despair at the fundamental depravity of it all.

*although, snerk, it's also kind of funny...

*Oh, well, I didn't mean -you.- Don't take it -personally.-

*What? It's just my opinion!

*YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!

*Stop judging me for judging you!

*Anyway, I'm -not- judging -you,- just that terrible awful icky thing that you claim is an integral part of your being,

*which you wouldn't claim anyway if you knew how brainwashed/damaged/foolish/Lost to Darkness you are.

*I'm only trying to help.

*Really, I'm not telling you what to do. All I want is for you to admit that no matter how you protest, deep down, I'm right, you are wrong about your own experience, and you -really feel just like I do.- Isn't that so much better?

*You're derailing. -Why- must you make it all about -you?- Can't you just be quiet and let us talk -about- you?

*yer so SELFISH. What about the Cause?

*Okay, now you're just being rude. How can I learn if you insist on being so rude and angry all the time?

*I can't be expected to know all about this stuff. I'm just thinking out loud.

*Besides, I am an expert (tm) on this subject, whereas you are only talking about your own experience and thus cannot be objective.

*You are oppressing/silencing me with your stultifying Political Correctness. Shut up!

*The problem with you is, you're just too sensitive. And also mean. To me.


*I'm not like other people! I can't stand pain, it hurts me!

*And, you won't even listen to reason, it's like bashing my head against a brick wall, in fact I actually AM bashing my head against a brick wall, o the noise, LALALALALA CAN'T HEAR YOUUUUUU...

*Okay, okay, clearly I screwed up, even though I still don't understand how exactly and it doesn't interest me much to be honest, but! I FEEL REALLY BAD BECAUSE YOU'RE YELLING AT ME *sniffle*, I'm a terrible person, I heap ashes and sackcloth upon my head, I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I SAID I'M SORRY GODDAMIT CHRIST WHAT MORE DO YOU UNGRATEFUL PEOPLE WANT ANYWAY

*Screw you guys, I'M GOING HOME.

...

*And ANOTHER THING...