Saturday, April 08, 2006

Street smarts, 2

This post over at Bitch Lab, on the multi layers of power struggle in street harassment scenes, over at had me thinking of a short piece I wrote for a late-night cabaret. Since I'm feeling self-indulgent (surprise), I'm gonna repost it here.

(btw post title refers back to an earlier, more prosaic post of mine on the general subject)

***

STREETWALK


In the dark, music: "There she was, just a-walkin' down the street, singin'/Do wa diddy diddy dum diddy do--" Music abruptly stops.



V.O.
Take one.

Lights up on WOMAN, about to cross a street. As she does, she must pass a MAN, standing against a wall.

MAN:
Hello...

WOMAN passes by quickly, eyes averted, head down.

I said, hello. Hello? Hello? Hello? Bitch. Hey, who the fuck do you think you are?

Blackout.

V.O.
Take two.

Lights up, same as before.


MAN:
Hello.

WOMAN passes without replying.

Miss, I sure hate to trouble you, but could you spare a little change?

WOMAN stops, a good distance away from the MAN, fumbles in her pocket.

I'm trying to get something to eat...Thank you.

As she digs some change out:

You're very pretty. Beautiful hair.

The WOMAN hands the change to the MAN. Doesn't reach quite far enough, and the change drops to the ground.

WOMAN:
(Mumbles)
Sorry...sorry...

WOMAN makes a half-hearted attempt to stoop, ultimately doesn't, begins backing away.



MAN:
That's okay. That's okay. Thank you.

As WOMAN flees


You have a nice day now.

Blackout.


V.O.
Take three.

Lights up, as before.

MAN:
(As WOMAN passes)
Hello.

WOMAN:
Hello.
keeps walking. MAN follows her.

MAN:
Your name's Janine, right?

WOMAN shakes her head and walks faster.


No? Cause I've seen you around. What's your name?

WOMAN:
Not Janine.

MAN:
What?

WOMAN:
Not Janine.

MAN:
Cause I know I've seen you...Hey, you live down the street, right? In that building over there? That big building right there, you live there?

WOMAN:
No.


MAN:
Yeah, I've seen you coming out that building...wearing that little skirt you wear...yeah, you like to wear that skirt, I see you...got your butt cheeks all hanging out...

WOMAN:
Get away from me!

MAN:
I'm not gonna hurt you. All I'm saying is, you got a nice ass, but you should be careful who you go showing it to, know what I'm saying?

WOMAN takes out a whistle and blows into it.

If you want, call me sometime, we can talk about it.

MAN goes. WOMAN flees in the opposite direction. Blackout.


V.O.
Take three-A.

WOMAN walks briskly and aggressively toward the MAN.


MAN:
Hello... seen you before...that skirt...

WOMAN:
Who the FUCK do you think I am?

WOMAN stomps past him, brandishing whistle with aggressive air. Makes eye contact, glares, passes at brisk trot.

Blackout.


V.O.
Take 3-A, once more, with feeling.

WOMAN hesitates at her end of the street. MAN is lounging in his accustomed spot. WOMAN revs up and sprints past him at top speed.


MAN:
Hello...

WOMAN darts past at the speed of lightning; shrieks as she passes.

What the fuck was that?

Blackout.


V.O.
Take pie-eye squared.

MAN by the wall. WOMAN walks up to him with an outstretched hand, eye contact, and a big smile.

WOMAN:
Hello! I just want to let you know that I consider you a person just as much as anybody else, and even though I have more money, support, education, and opportunity than you could ever dream of having, (or so I imagine), I forgive you. Go ahead! Sit on your steps and stare at me! Wear a bandanna and clothes with holes in them! It's all right! I give you permission! I'll not cross the street to get away from you when it's light out, and if you're lucky, I'll even give you a sickly
fake smile every once in a while!

MAN spits at her feet and walks off.


Well, get you. Who the fuck does he think he is?

Blackout.

V.O.
Take the negative of an odd number.

MAN:
Hello. Nice ass.

WOMAN:
(Wheels on him, starts unbuttoning her blouse)
Do you really think so? Because gosh, y'know, that's the most sensitive and flattering thing anyone's said to me all week. I mean, oh sure, you're the wrong age and background and even gender for me, not to mention you have terrible hygiene and may well be certifiably
insane, but hey, details, I'm so fucking HORNY at this antiseptic goddamn university my cunt feels like an Electrolux, why don't we do it in the road,

pushes him down and straddles him

yeah, talk dirty to me, baby, monosyllables TURN ME ON, don't stop...

MAN:
(Overlap)
Help. Help! Get the fuck away from me!

Blackout.


V.O.
Take a flying leap.

WOMAN walking down the street; MAN leaps out of nowhere and opens his coat at her.

MAN:
HELLO!!

WOMAN draws a gun.

WOMAN:
FUCK YOU!!

Shoots him. Blackout.


V.O.
Aaand...take it away....

WOMAN and MAN pass in opposite directions. WOMAN seems disoriented.

MAN:
(Courteous)
Hello.

WOMAN ignores him. MAN gives her a quizzical look, shrugs, and goes. WOMAN greets imaginary people. Trying to connect.

Um, hello. Hello. Hello! Oh, hello? Hello...

The lights fade. She gradually slows down, wanders more and more, and eventually stops. Her voice takes on a plaintive note.

Hello? Hello? Hellooo! Hello?

No response. She stands still and addresses someone "out there," becoming more and more frustrated and confused and angry-scared as she continues:

Hello? Hello? Hello! Hello, hello! Hello?! HELLO?! HELLO??? HELLO????? HELLO, HELLO, HELLO??? HELLOOO! HELLO?? ..hello?

Blackout, end.

17 comments:

Aishwarya said...

!!!!!!

EL said...

Are you performing your stuff at any particular cabaret?

Anonymous said...

Okay, so i liked the layered, serious ones, but...

Monosyllables turn me on!

dykotomy said...

fmma - please anounce your performances - if i can i'd love to see them!

Anonymous said...

Hello!

very nice post... enjoyed it very much.

Thank you
tosa inu

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P. Burke said...

This is great! I especially liked takes pie-eye squared and the negative of an odd number.

One scene I used to fantasize about starts out something like take three, except the woman (me) has huge retractable claws. When the guy won't leave her alone, she smiles and flashes the claws at him. He turns sort of pale and runs away.

(Yeah, being the recipient of aggression probably makes everyone a little bit twisted inside. I try not to pass it on.)

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