Laugh, clown! LAUGH GODDAMIT

So, Renegade has this post explaining about some shitsmear clever young man what's designed this line of T-shirts with the witty tagline,

"Cuttin' Up Hookers"

with apropos graphics in various stylish designs.

(nah, not linking, follow the breadcrumb trail from RE's).

but so anyway, Genius Boy himself shows up to defend himself, thusly:

Please lighten up. My shirts are designed to entertain, not offend.

And I also forward proceeds to various charities. I actually support hookers, in all reality. ;)

...PS, hookers sure don't complain when they take my dolla dolla bills yall! So all's well that ends well, say I.

and then, when mutual status as One Of The Tribe is appealed to, Alex (for that is apparently his name) goes:

Oy vey.

Please don't ever compare jews to hookers or gays again. That is just plain insulting, and you should know better if you really are one.

A better analogy would be to "beat up bums," "Superman strippers" or "kill Republicans." You know, keeping with the whole "low-life" theme here. (no offense to anyone)

Look, I respect your right to dissent. But you should also respect my right to exercise free speech. Which I see absolutely nothing wrong with.

Apparently you guys are too uptight to get my shirts - but plenty do. It's no different than a comedian. Should he quit simply because a few find him offensive? Shit, if that were the case, half of Jewish comics would be flipping burgers right now!

Look, I have some advice. Have a coupla tequila shots and come back when your sphincters have relaxed a notch. Lighten up, life is fun!

...whereas some of us aren't funny, merely angry :(

Ok, fair enough then.

I and many young men and women find my shirts uproariously funny.

A few harpies on the internet don't.

We done yet?

Or would you like me to send you a complimentary Cuttin T-shirt?


And to 222 - you seem very very angry. I don't think I can help you. Ever consider applying for Dr Phil's show?

Well, I for one certainly do not wish to be thought of as an uptight un-fun "harpie." I wish to join the merry laughter of all the young men and women out there. In fact, I want to help Alex gain more merry laughter, because clearly he's just a jolly sort of guy.

So, if -you- are a merry young man or woman and would like to appraise Alex of what -else- you find uproariously funny, you can, he informs us, contact him at his website, or more specifically, I suppose, at the information helpfully provided right there on his website:

http://www.aktenterprises.com/tchekmeian.php

Alex Karekin Tchekmeian

AKT Enterprises
11929 E. Colonial Drive #166
Orlando, Florida 32826

(T) 888.429.0666
(F) 407.574.3012

Email
alex@aktenterprises.com

Company Web Site
www.aktenterprises.com

General Company Contact
info@aktenterprises.com

--oh, look, BusinessWeek did a profile on him, what a mensch he must be.

Oh, yeah. In the spirit of citing one's sources, which has been rather a theme this week, I will say here that the original inspiration for RE's post was here, at a site called Buried Alive. Thanks for the h/t, sincerely.

(There: see how easy that was?)

xoxoxoxox

****

ETA: -cocks head- mkay. So, before my and this link go up, someone at RE’s publically suggests that this might not, in fact, be the real Alex T, but in fact a well-known troll. I write, well it DOES seem odd that anyone could be THIS stupid, lemme take this down while I double check. I double check the site. There’s a direct link at the bottom of the Cuttin’ Up Hookers page to AKT Productions, this guy’s base of operations. So I figure, right then, on with the show, and put the post back up.

Shortly thereafter, there’s a (now unlinked) comment by “Alex” at RE’s saying:

alex said…

Ok, um, some assclown was impersonating me and I’m sorry if anyone was unduly offended.

I love all women, not the least of which hookers!

So as a token of goodwill, I’m willing to send anyone a free “Cuttin’ Up Hookers” T-shirt personally signed by my radboy designer, Jared. And if you send in some photos of you wearing them, I might even add them to my site.

Let’s just stop the hate and let the good times roll, people! ;)

***

shortly after THAT, there’s this exchange at Buried Alive:

mkay. now he, or someone, says this over at Buried Alive:

My name is Alex Tchekmeian. I am 21 year old entrepreneur who is absolutely taken back by what is occurring right now.

My company is a t-shirt manufacturing and distribution warehouse. I am a regular guy who started receiving many emails regarding “my clothing line called cuttin’ up hookers.” and how disappointed people were in me.

After doing some extensive research I found this web site that somebody went on and posted fake comments trying to mask themselves as me. I have no direct affiliation with this clothing brand and people are acting as if it was my idea…

I am so beside myself because I would never write the things that were written here. I hope that this message gets through to people so that this can come to an end.

I am putting myself out there out of honesty so that this can be resolved. The truth of the matter is I have no affiliation with this organization and I do not support it. Somebody has posted falsified comments attempting to take a direct hit to my reputation and hard work.

My direct email is alex@aktenterprises.com.
Comment by Alex Tchekmeian - The REAL One April 14, 2008 @ 3:26 pm

(”Will the Real Alex Tchekmeian please stand up?”)

All right–welcome Alex. I am confused–does your company own District Lines?
Comment by pisaquaririse April 14, 2008 @ 3:38 pm

Yes, my company does in fact own District Lines.
Comment by Alex Tchekmeian - The REAL One April 14, 2008 @ 3:42 pm

Then you own “Cuttin’ Up Hookers” line of t-shirts, yes?
Comment by pisaquaririse April 14, 2008 @ 4:02 pm

While we do own clothing companies within AKT Enterprises (Messhead, Fuller and Skuzzy), Cuttin’ Up Hookers is not one of them. We are responsible for the printing and distribution of the Cuttin’ Up Hookers brand, however, we are not in any way the creators or promoters of the brand.

District Lines powers over 250 individual online stores, ranging from clothing companies, charities, activists and bands.
Comment by Alex Tchekmeian - The REAL One April 14, 2008

*****

I leave the interpretation of this latest development of events to you, gentle readers.

In either case it does seem that someone is doing Alex a public service, because as the REAL Alex is, by his own admission, "responsible for the printing and distribution of the Cuttin' Up Hookers" brand, he might want to take this opportunity to be apprised that many young men and women do not, in fact, approve of this particular fine line of merchandise, and he may wish to be disassociated with it henceforth.

I will also, without further comment, note this quote from his BusinessWeek profile:

Today, 20-employee AKT Enterprises consists of 15 businesses that revolve around the music industry and include merchandising, Web development, and online ticketing services. Most of AKT's clients are hardcore bands and record labels. Tchekmeian says the business had $1.3 million revenues in 2006 and estimates it will earn just over $3 million in 2007, with the bulk of the income coming from merchandising, all of which is produced in-house, because he doesn't "trust the quality of anyone else out there.”

***ETA 4/15: What she said.***

-waves merrily-