When I heard that an IBTP comments thread had erupted in Buffalo Bill comments, I knew exactly who was involved and exactly what was being said. I knew how it would play out, and which people would say which things. I could probably have made an educated guess about the topic that started the discussion–although in that case, I would have been wrong, because transphobia is always pertinent and interesting to these people. I had seen it happen virtually verbatim several times before, and will probably see it happen again many more times.
...I…get curious about people who hate me. I see what they write and I remember it without trying. I don’t know how normal that is and I don’t claim that it’s healthy, but a lot of other queers [emphasis mine] and transpeople seemed to react the same way. I’ve encountered the same frustration in response to what can only be the same insensitivity on my part, when other assholes have finished with preliminaries that only fooled me.
And, yes. That’s really been the bottom line for me, well one of them. Funny, you wouldn’t think, right? Hey, -I'm- not a transperson, what crawled up my crunchy granola skirt and died? I mean, BEFORE the stuff that pretty much anyone who wasn't a total bastard couldn't see was rank hatred, of course we all see the problem there. But that's just a few bad apples, right?
TF’s a lesbian, Heart’s a “political lesbian,” as are a whole shitload of that bunch (a bunch more are straight, though, separatists too, surprise), o sure they say hateful ignorant shit about transfolk and this or that alternative sexual practice, but c’mon, they’re on -your- side! How could they possibly be creating a homophobic atmosphere? If anything, they have a problem with HETEROSEXUALITY…oh, yeah, and your "corny lifestyle," but c'mon, that's not a SERIOUS ISSUE.
and, no, sorry, that’s not correct, as far as I’m concerned at least.
One doesn’t have to be on one’s knees before a male oppress0r or even particularly heterosexual to be thoroughly, annoyingly heteronormative. Some of us don’t -want- to rabbit on endlessly about the War Between the Sexes, because it’s like…’k, you’re from Venus, they’re from Mars, I…don’t speak your crazy moon language, either of you, any of you, so let’s call the whole thing off.
But that by itself wouldn’t have been enough to earn my rancor; i would’ve just drifted off.
No; it’s…well, you look at the latest shitstorm wrt transfolk, okay, i mean the last umpteen hundred comments or so, and you tell me. Suddenly, “radicals” are sounding eerily like…Focus on the Family. Sexual organs are for reproduction. Men are men and women are women (and okay maybe intersex are intersex mumble quick let’s move on, but) -and that can never, ever change.-
And, how disappointing and inexplicable that some lesbians side with those MEN in sheeps' clothing over -our kind-, says sister-girl.
Or, in a separate, but related case not very far away, a conventionally straight woman gloating over the errant dismissal of a woman (by yet another of this type, apparently) who was volunteering for a DV crisis centre, because she’s a stripper and porn performer and -it might frighten the horses I mean women.-
Rationalizations for the rankest bigotry, spin that would make Bill O’Reilly dizzy, approving links to the Daily Telegraph and people who use data from the Heritage Center, slut-shaming, arguing against gay marriage (albeit supposedly for “feminist” reasons), gender policing, sexuality policing, invoking the law to go after kinky folk, but most of all,
bunch of hatefully self-righteous people, many of whom being actually -straight- and/or celibate, running rampant all over those spaces, telling queer folk and other sexual “deviants” that they’re twisted or sick or selfish or at least hopelessly confused, poor dears, ruining it for everyone, a blot on society I mean the Movement, and THAT ISN’T EVEN QUESTIONED BY GOOD PROGRESSIVES AND FEMINISTS while all this other shit goes on…
…yeah. That just feels a little too familiar. And -not- in a good way.
So, I quit too. Whatever that is, even if I never really belonged, just for the record: I quit. I refuse to call it feminism, or at least THE feminism. I keep going through periods of -trying- to “live and let live.- But this just isn’t working out. At all. Because -they- aren’t doing that.
And yeah, okay, "fight the real enemy" (isn't this becoming a common theme these days?) But, when you sound like and even sometimes strange-bedfellow ally (in preference to the whores and trannies, mind) with the most reactionary, hateful--which includes, but is not limited to, homophobia and misogyny, structurally enforced, even--forces in the country...
well, with "friends" like this, who needs...any of this, really.