Saturday, September 23, 2006

And now, a matter of utmost urgency:


Cottage cheese.

What is up with this "smooth and creamy" bullshit? Listen, if I wanted "smooth and creamy" I'd've gotten bloody cream cheese. It's called CURDS AND WHEY for a REASON, people; and no, I do not want any of that low-fat crap either. 4%. Small curd. NOT smooth. CURDS. is it SO much to ask? i am a woman of simple needs, simple, I tell you.

**UPDATE!!**

And! AND!! AND ANOTHER THING. I have been watching Carnivale on DVD. I have no cable. I have, I say, been watching Carnivale, I am midway through Season Two, and just as I am getting -thoroughly- hooked i find out that the series has been CANCELLED. -Cancelled.-

Why, God? and why am i always the last to know these things?

I have no cable, and i must scream

22 comments:

Anonymous said...

Bullshit indeed. What is the world coming to?

Alon Levy said...

Even 4% is too skim... I grew up eating 9%.

belledame222 said...

NINE percent? Wow. I bet that's punishable by firing squad here & now.

no, though, i think i'm good with 4.

but that smooth stuff is just -nasty.-

A White Bear said...

Cottage cheese is one of those foods, like eggs and salad, that I somehow managed not to have had until well into my college years, but now happily indulge in.

There are others, like mayonnaise, that I still can't bring myself to choke down unless it is socially egregious not to.

belledame222 said...

LOATHE mayo. will be unsociable if that's what it takes.

well might make exception for garlic-laden homemad.

but the jarred stuff? gag.

ketchup, too.

Abadiebitch said...

I have never put cottage cheese in my mouth. I just cannot do it. I used to be tempted when I would see half of a peach lying on a bed of it in cafeterias, but just could not take the plunge. Good luck.

Veronica said...

Ew. Smooth and creamy cottage cheese is just wrong.

Twanna A. Hines | FUNKYBROWNCHICK.com said...

Yeah, it's kinda like lowfat chocolate. HEEEELLLOOO ... If I wanted a "lowfat" food, um, I wouldn't choose chocolate!

Vanessa said...

I know, Carnivale cancelled is total injustice!!! It's so much better than that stupid Big Love show HBO got instead.

Carnivale and Six Feet Under were my two favorite shows on TV. Now all I have is Project Runway. Sigh.

And I'm with Moksha on the cottage cheese. Just looking at it gives me the heebie jeebies.

Bimbo said...

This is in the same fashion that carob is 'like' chocolate. It's like saying, "No, I don't want to have an orgasm, I want to have something that vaguely reminds me of an orgasm in an unpleasant way."

Stop playing with my food! Back away from the cheese, man.

J. Goff said...

LOATHE mayo.

THANK GOD I'm a pescatarian, if only because I have an excuse now to not eat mayo. BLARGH! I actually had family members growing up who would put heaping dollps on my sandwiches just to make me eat it. I never forgave them.

J. Goff said...

And I never liked cottage cheese all that much, but anything that's supposed to be lumpy that they call "smooth" has to have multiple things wrong with it.

Erudite Redneck said...

Mama ER called it "cotton cheese" and splashed vinegar on it to get me to eat it when I was a little bitty ER. Nowadays, salt and lots of pepper will do.

Dr. ER takes every opportunity to smush up cucumbers and tomatoes with cotton cheese.

I think we would agree that curds are necessary!

BUTTERMILK is the yuckbarf "grown-up" food that I, strangely, as a 40-plus grup, have finally come to like. Good with cornbread, of course. Good with Fritos. Good with salty popcorn.

Sometimes nothing else will do -- with or without a munchy accompaniment. :-)

A White Bear said...

Belledame -- settle a wager for me and take this test: Here. Your results are needed to prove that not everyone who reads my blog is emotionally impaired.

belledame222 said...

OK: EQ 57 SQ 24

but what does it all mean, dear?

A White Bear said...

Yes! Yes! Hooray! See comments here for the whole picture.

A White Bear said...

In that someone suggested that none of my readers would score higher on EQ than SQ. Apparently we're all kinda autistic.

Tom Hilton said...

I was a kid on the East Coast, so seeing the Breakstone brand is a nostalgia hit. Tangy Small Curd was always my favorite--there really isn't anything quite like it out here on the West Coast.

Anonymous said...

oh, belledame, you kill me.

Anonymous said...

WHAT?!! They've mutilated my fucking cottage cheese! Is nothing sacred?! (Woo. Sorry, I'm from and live in Wisconsin. I like my cheese very, very much.)

belledame222 said...

on second thought, i have now seen the end of Carnivale, and...um. i dunno if they changed it when they learned it was gonna be cancelled, or whether this was always in the works. either way: i can't say i'm sorry there won't be more, at this point; what. a. mess.

yeh, i dunno. there were things i loved about the concept, and some of the actors were amazing, but the mythology was just risible, i thought. speaking of so structural you can't get out of it.

and the directing choices just seemed to get hokier and hokier, and the writing spun out of control as well.

eh.

belledame222 said...

otoh, i did have some PROPER cottage cheese the other day. had to go to Whole Foods in Manhattan to purchase it, but it was worth it. Horizon. 4%. Small curd. Ate the whole container at a sitting.

life is good again